HEALTH AND WELLBEING.

The Complexity of Wanting. 

“May you have the courage to listen to the voice of desire that disturbs you when you have settled for something safe.” - John O Donohue.

Desire and wanting is an intrinsic part of the human experience, influencing our behaviours, decisions, and motivations. It is dually a fundamental and complex aspect of our psychology, often acting as a driving force behind the pursuit of goals, relationships, and personal growth. Wanting is layered, it is not a simple or uniform experience. It can encompass a range of emotions, thoughts, and behaviors that can be constructive, destructive, or even paradoxical. It can be sought as a quest for control, for connection, or as a way of replacing something that is lost.

Yet underneath the surface, when we can recognise a superficial want from those that are deeper longings of the heart and follow them, we can realise a beauty or discover a truth that lies within us, giving a tangible form to the obscured.

Discerning between what feels a reactive want, to one that is one of depth can be a challenge. We can have become frightened of our wants during our childhood years as as we have been inadvertently been conditioned away from them, associating our wants with selfishness or greediness.

The conundrum in adulthood is feeling disconnected from our wants and desires can leave us feeling anguished. Never realising, or continually denying our desires can leave a feeling of unfulfillment and an emptiness that feels unsalveable, but meeting too many of our wants or the ones that are a bid for power can leave us feeling shameful and burnt. Thus the meeting of a want, is an art and requires consideration of what it is that the heart truly desires. When balanced and considered our wants and desires can be a source of richness, wonder and delight.

The way we relate to our wants and why we want them- the way we manage, fulfill, or let go of them may lead us a little closer to the person we wish to be, the person who we are.

26.Oct. 2024.

Image Kim Verdebo.